Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Blake's birth: Part 3

Part 1
Part 2

-----------------------------

At 4pm we were back at the hospital and I was getting my IV antibiotics.  While we waited for another visit from Dr. J, I paced around the room but was disappointed to find that the contractions had lost the intensity that they'd had at the mall.  We talked to the nurse, Angela, for a while and she told us that Dr. J's next step, if I hadn't progressed much, would probably be breaking my water.  I balked a little at that idea, because I wanted to have as natural a birth as possible and the miso tablet had already steered me in the opposite direction, so I was really in the frame of mind to say no to everything at that point.  Daniel and I agreed that if I hadn't progressed much, and things were going to move at such a slow pace, we would rather just go home.  Angela encouraged us to let Dr. J know that's what we wanted.

Finally around 6pm, Dr. J came in, and I was 5cm dilated.  Just as the nurse had said, he suggested we break my water.  I told him that even though my contractions had been regular all day, they were lacking in intensity, and I would rather go home and wait.  He balked at that idea as bad as I had at his!  He told me that breaking my water would almost certainly get my contractions much more intense.  I guess I didn't appear to be changing my mind, so he said he would step out for a minute and let us think about it.  He had such a disappointed look, like he felt like we were making the wrong decision, but he was going to let us go if that's what we wanted.

 I think that as he was leaving, I knew immediately that we were going to stay.  I realized that A) breaking my water is not like using a drug, so I could still consider it a nearly natural birth, B) he was probably right about the effect breaking my water would have on my contractions, and C) ultimately I was still a very impatient overdue pregnant woman and just wanted to have this baby asap.

He came back in, we told him our decision, and at 6:20pm he broke my water.

He was right, of course, and very quickly my contractions got more intense and more frequent. I stayed sitting up in bed, and just focused on breathing in and out slowly, exhaling with a shhhhh through my teeth, which helped me relax through them.    Angela, the nurse, stayed in the room to chat with us, but by about 7pm I needed silence during each contraction, and didn't ask for it very politely, I'm sorry to say.  I even threw up at some point, but I was powering through, breathing and relaxing completely.  I remember wondering how long this might last.

We talked about getting into the tub, but I was reluctant because the room with the tub was down the hall.  They weren't set up for water births, so if we stayed until I had the urge to push, I would have to fight it all the way back to the room.  The contractions were so strong and close together that I didn't think I could get out of bed anyway.

During those contractions, one picture kept popping into my head.  It was from the Disney movie Fantasia, during Toccata and Fugue, which is the one that's mostly abstract pictures.  Here's a link to it on YouTube: Toccata and Fugue in D Minor.  It's toward the end, and it's quick - from 7:10 to 7:20.  Apparently, that's what my subconscious thinks contractions look like.  In case you're wondering, I only saw the image...didn't hear any music.  :)

During a contraction at about 7:35pm, I had the feeling that I needed to pass gas, and I mentioned it to our new nurse, Marissa (there had been a shift change).  I don't know why I mentioned it - that's not something I will normally just tell people.  Daniel said, "Hey, if you do, you can blame it on me" but even between contractions I couldn't find the humor, and I think I just gave him a good scowl (later, I reassured him that under any other circumstances he would have gotten at least a chuckle).  However, it's a very good thing I did mention it, because she told me that it meant I'd probably be pushing soon, and sure enough...

...next contraction: "I'M PUSHING!"  That's a direct quote.  Not "I think I need to push", not "Can I push?", but "My body is pushing and there's nothing I can do about it!"

Marissa quickly checked me, and I was completely dilated.  she called Dr. J, who had been in the cafeteria getting dinner, and he was in the room right away.  After that, Daniel stopped making updates to our Word doc and the details are a little fuzzy.

One part I do remember distinctly: my favorite moment of the delivery (well, second favorite) was when one of the nurses asked me, "Do you like these socks?  If you want to keep them, we need to take them off right now!"  I said yes, and Daniel took them off for me.

The room filled up with nurses, and they ran around getting the bed and the room ready.  I was pushing like crazy.  Daniel and a few nurses were with me but nobody was counting down from ten during the contractions, and I kept wishing somebody would, because the pressure was so great and so constant that I couldn't really tell when each contraction ended.

One of the nurses was holding a fetal monitor to my belly, and became alarmed when the heart rate dropped very low, so low that she wasn't sure if she was picking up the baby's heart rate or mine (the baby's is normally much faster than an adult's).  They suspected there was pressure on the umbilical cord, so they helped me turn onto my left side, in an effort to relieve the pressure on the cord and also to get a better angle for the fetal monitor.  While this was happening, Dr. J decided that the baby needed to come out as soon as possible, so he prepared to give me a pudendal block.  This is a local anesthetic that would allow him to use forceps to help guide the baby out.  When it was ready, one of the nurses, Geneva, told me I needed to not push for a minute while he gave the injection.  I think I gave her a look, like what do you mean not push??, but she helped me do it.  when the block was done, Dr. J used the forceps and at 7:53pm, after roughly 18 minutes of pushing, Blake Elizabeth was born!

The rest is history, I guess.  They put her right up on my belly, and Daniel cut the cord.  I'm so so glad we didn't find out the gender by ultrasound.  The surprise was amazing.

They didn't take her away from me for the longest time, and I kept half-wishing they would, because I was curious about her weight and length.  In fact they didn't do any of that until after Daniel's parents arrived with Hollie.  It was so good to see them.  :)

---------------------------------------------------------

There are more little stories to tell, but there are too many for now.  We're busy getting ready to head back to Wichita!  Yep, we're leaving this weekend, and taking 6 or 7 days to get back.  We have really enjoyed living here, but it will be good to be home again.

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Blake's birth: Part 2

Alternately titled: Setting the bar really really high with three posts in one day

Hollie played by herself for quite a while this morning, and both girls napped at the same time, so instead of showering, I did this!  You're welcome.

I don't know why the spaces are so big here...I'll try to get it fixed...

I need to thank Daniel for his note-taking during my labor.  Soon after we arrived at the hospital, I got out the laptop and opened a Word document.  I titled it "labor", saved it on the desktop, and started out with:


[spoiler alert]


7:30- 3cm 50% effaced, stripped membranes

I continued making updates on my own until about the time that [spoiler alert] my water broke.  After that, Daniel took over, and as you'll see he did an amazing job.

We still have that Word doc saved on the desktop, but the title is changed to "blake".

Part 1
Part 3

-----------------------------------------------------


We left the house a little late the next morning, but rather than get stressed out (the way being late usually affects us), we joked and kept the mood light.

At 7:30am Dr. J, my OB, met us in the room and we got to business.  I was 3cm dilated and 50% effaced, so he stripped my membranes…without warning me…yikes. 

I started having contractions right away.  They weren’t very strong, but they came at regular intervals (I don’t remember how far apart, probably in the 5 to 7 minute range).  I stayed in bed, and we watched True Grit.  I’m not normally a fan of Westerns, but it was really good!

Because I have Group B strep, I was going to need antibiotics by IV.  I got my first dose at 8am.  It only took about 20 minutes, but they left the IV in, because I would need another dose every four hours until the birth.

At about 9am, Dr. J came back to check me again - 4cm and 70% effaced.  We decided to go ahead with the misoprostol tablet, which is placed next to the cervix.  After that, I needed to stay in bed for another hour while it dissolved and started to work.

After the hour was up, I got out of bed for a stretch, a potty break, and a snack.  I was really glad to be allowed to eat this time (not the case with Hollie - they had given me IV fluids with glucose the whole time I was in labor.  I never felt hungry the whole day, but it felt weird not eating at all). 

I hadn’t really had any change in my contractions.  Still regular at about 5 to 7 minutes, but not very strong.  I was a little sleepy just from being up so early, so I decided to stay in bed and get some rest…knowing the real work was still ahead.  The movie was getting really good, too.

At noon, I was due for my second dose of antibiotics.  We had finished the movie, so I took my IV stand and we walked around the hallways.

We went back to the room about a half hour later, when the fluid bag was empty.  With my doctor’s approval, we got permission to leave the hospital for one hour.  We went to Jamba Juice!  I got something “caribbean” or “tropical” with orange and mango in it.  It was just what I was craving, and it was sooo good.  This Jamba Juice happened to be inside a Whole Foods store, so Daniel went to pick up some fruit for us to snack on at the hospital while I waited for the smoothies - and I may have also snuck over to the bakery to grab a triple-chocolate cookie, but you know, the whole day’s a blur and I can’t really remember.  :)

At 1:15pm we were back at the hospital, where they hooked me up to the monitors just to see how we were doing.  Everything was fine, but there still hadn’t been much change in my contractions (they were maybe just a touch stronger).  We could have done another misoprostol tablet at this point, but we decided against it. 

We asked if we could leave the hospital again, and while we waited for an answer (doc was busy), I stood and paced around the room.  I was starting to find that the contractions were more intense when I stood or walked.  The nurses were always asking me where I was on the “pain scale”, from one to ten - one being no pain at all, and ten being the worst pain you’ve ever felt.  I had been at about a two all day, and at this point maybe up to a three, but I had to tell them that I was really just feeling an increase in intensity…hadn’t really felt anything painful at all yet.

At 2:30pm, we got permission to leave the hospital for an hour and a half, because at 4pm I would need another dose of antibiotics.  This time, we went to a big mall nearby, to walk. 

While we were there - specifically, in the Brookstone store - browsing for things we’ll never have the expendable income for (or really need, anyway) (but are fun to look at), the contractions starting getting pretty strong.  I had been able to keep walking for them before, but now I was having to stop.  We could have stayed longer, but I told Daniel that we ought to head back to the hospital.  I even had him go get the car while I waited by the door.  We weren’t about to have the baby or anything, but I was just getting uncomfortable.

-----------------------------------------------------

Is it cruel of me to stop here?  Sorry.  You know how everything turned though, right? :)

Wow, two posts in one day!

I haven't posted pictures in a really long time.  And I have lots.

Here are some of the better ones!







For the most part these are self-explanatory, but sometime I'll come back and add descriptions.

Funny things Hollie has said lately

Someone said something about Hollie being a big sister now, and she protests, "I'm not big sister - I'm Hollie!"

I was trying to convince Hollie that there's no longer a baby in my belly, and she suggests, "We need to get another baby in the store."  In almost every conversation we have these days, she tells me we need [something] "in the store".

I had made a smoothie to share with her, so I poured some into her cup and started drinking the rest right from the blender (we always try to set a good example around here).  She looked at me, wide-eyed, and said, "That's a biiiig cup!  Go show baby Blake!" and pointed across the room to her sister.

One afternoon, she was wound up and running around the house clicking her tongue.  I asked what she was doing, and she said, "It's a song about Mother Goose".

She told me, "You gotta be kidding me!"
Phonetically, for full effect: "You gah be kimmee!"

Daniel was cooking dinner, and Hollie and I were helping, while I held Blake in one arm.  I told her, "Good job, Hollie!", and she came right back with "Good job, Mommy!" and "Good job, Daddy!".  I asked her if Blake was doing a good job, too, and she thought for a minute before saying, "Nooo."

Her latest method of getting my attention is to plead, "Turn your head, Mommy!"

Just this afternoon, I’m changing Blake’s diaper and her clothes - she’s not happy about it, and she’s letting me know.  Hollie tells me, “Blake wants Daddy.”  Umm, ouch?!

Last but not least, my very favorite:
We were at the park yesterday, just walking along, and she said, "Did you know cars go pee-pee in a little potty outside?"

--------------------------------------------------------

We have been busy around here (maybe that goes without saying) but in good ways.  Working on updates, promise!

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Blake's birth: Part 1

As I'm writing this, it's becoming a novel, so I'm going to post it in installments.  This is the boring one, about the day before the birth.  They will get more interesting after this, I promise.


Part 2
Part 3

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was the Fourth of July, and we were four days overdue.  Daniel’s parents were staying with us, to be home with Hollie when Daniel and I went off to the hospital when the time came.  Daniel’s brother and his family had driven up from Portland for the long weekend, hoping to see Baby, though they had to go back the next morning and would miss her by just a few hours (so they ended up driving back up again the next weekend). 

I got a phone call that afternoon from my OB.  He had been out of town the entire previous week, so he was just calling to check up on me (isn’t that awesome?).  One of us, I don’t remember who, brought up induction.  He understood how I felt about it, but I also understood the risks of going too far overdue and to be honest, I was losing patience and was just really-really ready to be done being pregnant.  I asked what options we had other than Pitocin, and he kind of chuckled at me changing my mind about it (induction), but he said (I’m paraphrasing), "Please realize- Pitocin is my last resort.  We will try everything else first.  It’s obvious that you had a bad experience with it last time, and frankly I don’t understand why they started you off with it."
 
So, without hesitation I agreed to go in to the hospital the next morning for a “gentle” induction.  The plan was to first see if I was dilated enough for him to strip my membranes*, and if not, we would try a misoprostol tablet.  We were really excited to know we’d have our baby soon, and I was really excited to have the less aggressive induction and see if and how my labor would start.  I was a little disappointed that we weren’t going to have the wake-up-in-the-middle-of-the-night-with-contractions experience, or the dropped-off-at-the-hospital-entrance-while-Daniel-parks-the-car experience, that I had been hoping for, but I was beginning to see that going overdue is just normal for me (turns out it’s genetic - my mom went over a week overdue with all three of her pregnancies!).  I can accept that, especially knowing now (spoiler alert…) that I can have a [mostly] natural birth anyway, and have a great experience while I’m at it.

*By the way, if you don’t know what that means, Google it at your own risk.

Later that afternoon, we were preparing our big Fourth of July lunch and realized we didn’t have any matches to start our little grill we had purchased for the occasion.  Daniel and I left the crowd at home and took a long walk to the grocery store.  We figured it would be the last opportunity we would have to be alone together for quite a while!  At the store, we rented a movie, True Grit, to watch the next day at the hospital if we got a chance.  We were also surprised to see a book called “McElligot’s Pool”, a classic Dr. Seuss book that we thought was out of print.  My dad used to read it to me when I was a kid, from the copy he got when he was a kid, and he recently gave me it to me for Hollie.  We read it to her a lot, and she loves it, but we don’t let her handle it because it’s about to fall apart.  In fact, we had left it in Wichita because we didn’t want to risk damaging it in the move.  We bought that copy in the store, and saw it as a good sign for the next day.  It was so cool to bring it home for Hollie that evening. 

After we got back, I remember feeling that I was "allowed" to relax at that point.  I had been having this awful feeling that there is some magical secret thing women are "supposed" to do to start labor and I wasn't doing it.  I know it's silly.  As a result though, I had been walking quite a bit for the last week or so, feeling like if I wasn't walking or generally staying active then I wasn't doing anything to get my labor started.  This is a glimpse into the mind of an irrational overdue pregnant woman.  It was keeping me very busy.  So, having made the decision to induce, and being at peace with it, I finally felt like I could sit back and be lazy for an evening.

It was so tough putting Hollie to bed that night, knowing that we wouldn't see her in the morning.  Actually, knowing that we probably wouldn't see her until after the baby was born!  For once, we were the ones not wanting to turn off the lights.

However, I think Daniel did sneak into her room the next morning to give her a kiss before we left, even though I was worried that she would wake up.  For the record, she didn't, and she slept late that morning.

To be continued...